My mom Alice Barton lives on Cape Cod. The beach is part of her soul. She moved to Cape Cod in the early 1990's after retiring from being an English Professor at UMass Boston. She is a brilliant writer, poet, and wordsmith. She has authored two books. She adopted and raised two children mostly as a single mom. She married the love of her life when she was 56 years old. She loves to travel; she took a 3-week-ship to Europe after WWII to work for a magazine (she won the ship's beauty contest and wrote the weekly newsletter). In her late 50's she went to Japan. She still wants to go to China. Since my mom "retired" she has been busier than ever with book club, writer's work shops, tennis club, lunch dates, community service, singing group, tutoring, becoming an opera lover, enjoying her beloved ocean, spoiling her grand children, and spending time with family. She has 2 grand-children, 2 grown children, 5 brother's and sisters and a ton of nieces nephews and an army close friends.
She also has cancer. After surviving lung & thyroid cancer earlier in her life A few years ago she was diagnosed with breast cancer. We thought that she had kicked it's butt...then last December when she was 78 it came back in her liver. She officially had "Stage 4 Cancer" that sounded very scary. She was told that this cancer could not be cured, but if she had regular chemo treatments the cancer would not kill her. Since the chemo treatments for the first time in her life she has been acting her age. On 2/13/12 at the age of 79 she was told that the liver cancer had grown and new cells had formed on her bones, lungs, and perhaps brain. She has between 6-months and two years to live depending on how well she responds to new higher intensity chemo. I am 42-years old and I have never had cancer, but I was adopted by an amazing woman and mother who is my best friend and I am terrified to lose her.
I haven't told the kids yet and I can't sleep. Hoping writing will help.
You don't have to let her go yet. Hang on as tight as you can for as long as you can. ((HUGS))
ReplyDeleteOh dear Lydia,
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry that you are facing the pain of losing your Mom. She sounds like a lovely woman that any one would be blessed to know.Spend as much time as you can with her. Treasure of moments you store up will be priceless to you. Let your children be involved. My mom lived with us the last year because my dad had just died too. My girls were 8 and 10 (named Lydia BTW) and they wanted to help take care of grandma. I am so glad I let them. We had a hospice nurse who became part of the family. We cried and we laughed a lot! My mom taught me how to live and I am honored that she taught me how to die. There is no way to avoid the pain, because you love you mom. Celebrate her! God Bless you!
Clara
I am sorry you and your mother have to go through this. It was one of the worst times in my life while I watched my mother fight cancer and then finally 'give up'. Oddly it was also a great time for our relationship. I didn't get to see her as much as I wanted but I was there as much as possible and cherish every moment. It was very hard to lose her and I miss her terribly everyday. Take advantage of every moment with her while you're in it and try not to dwell on what may come. I'm here for you if I can ever be of any help or provide comfort.
ReplyDelete-Angela :-)
Thoughts and prayers for you and for your amazing Mom. I agree with previous commenters - spend as much time with her as you possibly can. Hugs for you Lydia.
ReplyDelete